To Praise Or Not To Praise?

By | May 20, 2010

We are showering our children with praises for every little thing they do since they first enter the world. Is that a good thing? I am starting to think that excessive praising can actually go against what we are trying to help them achieve. What is that, you’re asking? Resilience, for example. And the desire to be challenged. And the desire to become even better at what they’re doing.
By praising them at every step, aren’t we encouraging them to settle for mediocrity? Won’t they settle for “good enough” just because we tell them “that’s great” to whatever they do? I am not saying we should not give them proper encouragement. We all need that, and encouragement at the right time is great and necessary. I simply believe that excessive praising undermines people’s ability to monitor their own progress objectively and fulfill their dreams. And by doing that to our children we are getting them used to that somewhat misleading and yet addictive feeling of instant gratification which we as a society have too much of nowadays anyway.

 

So let’s praise less, communicate more – with our children, our loved ones and with our own selves too. What are your thoughts?
 

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