The Way We Love, Why We Need To

By | August 21, 2013

It like that...It’s not how we think of love that makes love grow in our hearts, but how we come into it and how we become who we are by being in it. We learn to love by being loved.

It’s how we search for it even when we are not aware of doing so, because it is through love that we find ourselves. Love and acceptance give the courage to see our true selves and spark the desire to better ourselves.

We don’t choose how to love, we follow its course. We don’t choose the location of the dents love will make in our hearts. Some people we attach ourselves to because of the bond that’s woven for us through birth. Some people we cross paths with as we sail through life and come to love. There’s sharp turns and there’s mountains and valleys. If you can carry love through it all, it is meant to be.

To love is an act of courage. You give yourself and thus make room in your heart for those who give themselves to you.

There are no instructions on how to. It is a personal journey. The way you love your parents, your children, the love you share with siblings or the love for your partner; it’s yours to discover, decipher, struggle with if you have to and work at it as if your life depends on it. Because it does.

A few days ago I was telling my ailing dad about my impending trip back home after spending a longer time with him. He smiled at first, calmly acknowledging. Half hour later he called and asked about the trip. His hand wanted to hold mine. Words did not come easy anymore.

It was not the trip plans that made his hand grab onto mine and his eyes tear up. No bridges of emotional restraints were able to hold against the simple, deep affirmation of love.

He wanted me to knowt how much he loves me, and I did the same. Pain and heavy thoughts tore at my heart, but were replaced later by gratefulness. To cry is a liberation. To cry together becomes a blessing.

It is good that I did, I may not have another chance.

To have...It’s not much different with the other people in my life. My sons grow and extend their wings into whatever tomorrow we build together. The wind that will carry them at least over a few mountains as they do so is the love that I have for them. I need to build it strong.

Not for them to guess or wish they can be sure of. They need to be gifted the love they never have to think of asking. Love they can be sure of.

The love for people who touch my life and my soul is as deep as can be. No buts, no ifs, no holding back.

Our time here is borrowed, we need to grow wise to use it fully. To make it meaningful for ourselves and those around us through the love we share. Starting with ourselves.

Two. If life, no evil intentions whatsoever, has you limp in the love you have for yourself, well, it’s rather painful to step on that path that carries you through some murky waters you happen upon. But if you’re lucky, someone might come along and carry you until you heal and learn to love and trust.  And you will. I do. Be grateful. I am.

To love is to fulfill a need. To grow, to help grow, to become human. To love where we come from, to see as far as we can see, to hug as tight as we can and to hold onto the hearts of those we love with ours.

 

 

 

 

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