Gratitude makes the journey better and so does kindness

Month: February 2011

Why This Bookstore Is A Good Place To Be. One Of The Best, In Fact

I walk into one of the used bookstores in my neighborhood knowing the feeling I’ll have on the other side of the door. A good one. Peaceful. Every time I enter this place is like entering a friend’s living room. Comfortable and welcoming. Today is no different. A sunny day, all inflamed with that somewhat misleading yet overwhelming smell of early spring. The floor is soft and light brown, it feels like it’s made of soft caramel, one could say on purpose so that the noise made by visitors’ steps will be soaked up in its softness and thus not wake up the rows of sleeping books. There is old French music playing in the background, gentle forgotten voices. Barely audible, and that’s loud enough.

Steve, the owner, smiles. Always. He did so the first time I entered his newly opened store last year and asked about “Alice in Wonderland”. He’ll get it for me, he offered kindly, and he did, a few days later. A 1923 edition, no less, with beautiful drawings with a red so vivid it’s hard to believe it’s been there for almost a century. The book smelled very much like my grandpa’s books, old and inviting at the same time, and the first sniff whipped some good memories of the house I grew up in and the grapevine-sheltered green bench that was for years my favourite reading place. Somehow sharing that did not feel out of place.
Today is the store anniversary. It’s been a year, Steve says. His friend Casey from down the street stopped by for a congratulatory visit. He’s a jolly fellow and jolly is good. It’s good when people laugh, or at least smile, Casey says. Life may be tough at times, but then again you have nothing to lose if you smile. He’s right, I tell him so, and then I think of my crazed morning and how I forgot to smile. I’ll try to remember next time. We talk about kids and parents, people we know, seemingly ordinary people doing remarkable things, books we read, we share dreams, each of us candidly admitting fears and limitations. There is acceptance and encouragement. And laughs. No pretentiousness. It’s past noon now. A couple of people enter the store. They seem to like it. Steve offers to bring a chair to a guy whose been there for a while now reading while we chatted. The guy smiles, surprised. It feels good when you’re not rushed out of a place but invited to stay a while. And read, no less.

The sun is shining, the air is yellow and warm. I leave the store with its rows of sleeping books and caramel floors behind and wish Steve the best. I might leave the neighborhood at some point, who knows, but I hope his bookstore stays. It should. Because it’s a good place to be. One of the best, in fact.
 

Gratitude Is At My Fingertips After All. Always

I got up early today all pumped for a morning ride. Chilly mornings and bike rides go well together given that the appropriate layers are put on. Not in numbers but texture-wise. So I did. Double gloves included, having learned my lesson from a previous ride. There were quite a few commuting cars on the road but I didn’t mind them. Their zooming past is part of that morning music that I listen to as soon as I hop on my bike.

 

I biked along sleepy-looking houses and through crowded intersections until I got to roll on the road that slithers along the ocean shore, a most favourite part of my ride. The ocean was a rather metallic blue, streaked with ribbons of white water. Beautiful, but it made me think of cold as in COLD. My fingertips agreed. It felt like I had pain thimbles growing on my thumbs. It hurts quite a bit, I must admit, but usually the thrill of the ride takes the some of that edge of. What luck! And then I saw him. Just getting out of his sleeping bag, a homeless guy who spent yet another night behind one of the concession stands was rubbing his hands. I tried to imagine what his nights were like. I was heading home to a hot shower, warm breakfast and hot tea. Cold morning or not, I had nothing to complain about but be grateful that I have a bike to ride on fast enough that my fingertips get awfully cold – my choice after all!, time to go for that ride, enough layers to put on. That I have eyes to see places and people and a mind to understand that gratitude is a word that should be a permanent fixture in the heart and not just make a temporary appearance on the lips.

Most of all, that I have the luxury to think of cold weather as a fun challenge to add to my training routine as opposed to a real, often times life-threatening adversity that winter is for many unfortunate people out there. And for those of you saying, well, everybody has a choice, homeless people included, I’d say let’s decide that we judge after trying to help. And only then. If we still feel like it, that is… Ain’t gratitude something?

Lessons From A Bright Green Frog

It was a Saturday morning in early spring. One of those spring mornings when I was happy to finally see patches of blue behind the clouds that seemed sewn onto the sky for weeks and taking a walk with my son, who was two at the time, seemed the perfect way to honour my joy.

Walking around the neighborhood meant that he would go after the tiniest insect and observe it for several long minutes and then he would watch a droplet a water balancing on the tip of a twig, round and plump.

Would another one take its place if it fell? Most likely. Dripping is a fascinating phenomenon. As adults we choose to be annoyed by it, but we were all entranced by water dripping once upon a time. A matter of perspective perhaps.

Our walk took us through puddles, under some dew-weeping branches, and around various timeless creepy crawlies such as earthworms and millipedes. Occasionally, a passerby would smile and try to locate the object of our fascination. Other people’s eyes glanced over us like we were yet another bus stop poster.

A couple of blocks later we walked by a guy who had a whole bunch of nothings on a blue tarp on the wet grass. A garage sale, my son pointed out. I’d usually stop and look around, have a chat and maybe try to find a little piece of someone else’s life to buy and add it to my own tapestry.

Not this time.

My eyes skimmed over the things spread out on that worn out tarp and they all seemed tired and old and my only thought was “He’ll never sell any of that, it’s all junk”. Malicious? You could say that again.

So we kept on walking turning another corner and a few minutes later someone’s running steps echoed behind.

“Would your son like this? Please, take it.”

The garage sale guy was holding a bright green Kermit – that beloved quirky frog from the Muppet show – and was offering it to my son.

The big smile on the guy’s face and the happy green colour of the frog dangling in his hand made me cringe. I felt ashamed. I accepted the gift and thanked him, almost not daring to look him in the eyes. I wanted to apologize but it wouldn’t have not been enough or made it right. Instead, I wanted to make it so that I will always remember. Judging is an ugly deed. Now it exists in writing and it’s a promise.

Kermit is still one of my son’s favourite stuffies. Bulging plastic eyes and all. I am staring at his wrongly sewn droopy thin arms right now and I see nothing wrong with it. He is the talisman of my humility.

Every now and then I tell my sons the story of how we came across Kermit. He is my son’s toy, but I can say, and without a trace of self-importance, that he was given to me. Because I needed to learn. I hope I did.

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