Gratitude makes the journey better. Kindness, too.

Author: Daniela Ginta Page 87 of 99

My path is a winding one. I write, I raise my sons, I love and I live.
Waking up to a new adventure every day. I have all that I need at every moment.

Rhinos and Frogs and Us, Oh My (An Older Post)

Sasha keeps asking to go to the Aquarium. I hesitate. In fact, I plainly refuse to do so. Here’s why. The place that always tugs at my heart from opposite directions. They do a lot of conservation work and educate people about the fragile marine environment and how global warming is a reality we can no longer ignore. Almost extinct species are being cared for and hopefully they’ll multiply enough to be released in the wild. That’s one side, the bright one. And we need it like oxygen.

And then, the dark side. The gift shop just adjacent to the almost extinct frog species is selling plastic frogs. Many species of frogs are already extinct and present only as sad reminders in aquariums and other similar conservation places. Why are they extinct? Because we pollute the oceans, rivers and lakes by dumping all sorts of chemicals in them, because of our insatiable desire to acquire yet another thing, because we rely on non-renewable resources with all our might, because we deforest entire continents without thinking twice about it. Harsh but true. Louis XV was harshly criticized by his contemporaries and many generations after – my elementary history teacher included – for his lack of morals and the contended carelessness “Apres moi, le deluge“, “After me, the deluge.”  Whether he said it or not, no one knows for sure. But he sure acted like it. Back to the frogs, not that I actually left the issue. What’s wrong with buying mementos, you’ll say. They might serve as education tools. Might is not do. And if it were, do is not without fault, not in this case.  If the manufacturing factories spew chemicals in the air then the plastic frogs are not toys but bullets. For both frogs and kids. Later they become garbage after being thrown out. Some of the plastic frogs and pink belugas might end end up in the ocean – what bitter irony – where they add to the growing patches of garbage already floating there and damaging marine life to the point of killing it. It’s just like complaining that kids are overweight while continuing to feed them fast food. It’s simply wrong.

I know that gift shops such as this are yet another way of raising money for research that will ultimately help the animals. But relying on the money coming from the very thing that’s causing the damage in the first place is ethically crooked. Not an isolated issue. Isn’t it after all the equivalent of selling cigarettes in a hospital that treats lung cancer patients.

What to do? Buy fewer toys and trinkets made from non-renewable resources. No buying of toys from gift shops of conservation centres. Sure they bring joy, yet in all fairness that joy is short-lived anyway and I personally believe that buying frogs for our children to play with will not teach them much about the danger frogs are in. Whether they are made hard or soft plastic, most toys leave a trail of chemicals behind, with serious effects ranging from cancer to developmental problems, and that will affect not only the wildlife but our children as well.  Harbinger of doom I am not, I simply call it as I see it.

It takes more than one flower to bring the spring back, but we can still do it.

In the end it is not necessarily just the frogs; their sad and quiet – I wish I could say slow too but I’d feel slightly irresponsible if I did – disappearing is but a symptom, one of many that the world we live in needs our help. Some may say that the world has more arduous problems than disappearing frogs that need immediate attention. And that’s true. Yet the cynical response to that would be that all the problems no matter how severe will not exist should there not be a planet to live on for the people who create them in the first place. The responsible answer is that we’re all connected. In case of frogs, you see, their bodies that act like sponges and thus environmental heralds. Simply put, their skin absorbs all the chemicals we dump and they get sick and die. A more evident hint I could not think of. It’s all connected. The big circle of life. Yes I got the line from The Lion King.

It’s been a year since I wrote this post. In the meantime there have been a few more species that made it on the critically endangered list, including tigers, leopards, sea turtles, gorillas. In 2006 we lost the last of the West African black rhinoceros. Shame. And lost count of already extinct frog species.

The way I see it, we’re running towards this sudden dropoff zone. Soaring and falling are the two choices. We can soar but only if we figure out how to fly by the time we get there. Slowing down to do so means we get a chance to see the world around. If enough of us slow down, we all will eventually. I’d call it making time. Is that vane or hopeful?

Poppies Are Red

We are headed to the Royal Canadian Legion to get a poppy tray in light of Remembrance Day coming up soon. Boys Scouts like Tony – plus parents for chaperoning – are invited to volunteer for a couple of hours. It’s a good thing, the least we can do, we both agree. The elderly gentleman greeting us, Mr. R., he’s all spruced up and affable. He explains to us the details of the mission and tells us the names of the people we’re supposed to get in touch with at the poppy spot. Tony feels very important as Mr.R. attaches a red ribbon to his chest, a sign that he’s with the Royal Canadian Legion. When you’re nine it does not get better than this on a rainy Friday afternoon. I feel like we’re headed to a rescuing mission and in a way we are I guess. Plus, times with just the two of us are rare and precious and I treasure each and every one of them.
We arrive at Save-on-Foods and look for the manager, our main poppy liaison here. We only find the human-sized cardboard version as the real person left for the day. Well then. The next person in rank has no clue we were coming but he can’t refuse the poppy affair so he brings us a table and two chairs.
“This is not looking good, Mom, I don’t think people will get any poppies.” Tony’s doubt is real. He has never done this before and I haven’t either. But it’s enlightening to be on the other side. A middle-aged guy breaks the ice. He drops a loonie in the collection box and takes a poppy. We smile and say thank you. An elderly woman comes next, she looks kind and happy. It’s a good thing. As we sit and chat, we get a stream of people walking by with their groceries. Some stop, put the bags down and reach for change or bills to donate for poppies. They leave the store with a crimson poppy on their chest and Tony’s smile trailing behind as a reminder of how good this place is with the sacrifice of all people who fought in wars.
“Mom, why are some people looking the other way when they pass by us? Other people don’t stop for poppies but at least they smile.” An astute observation by all means. I explain the best I can. Body language 101. Some people don’t know how to say no, I guess, so they avoid being put in a situation where they have to do so. But it is important to wear poppies, we owe that to the ones who sacrificed the most precious asset and to the ones who risked it and are still around to tell the story.  As Mr. R. said, as important as it is to get money to keep the veteran services running, the most important thing is for people to wear the poppies. We ought to remember, and the little crimson red does the trick.
We get some five dollar bills and lots of coins. Two little girls stop and stare while waiting for their mom to pay for groceries.
“The flowers sure are nice,” the oldest says. Her braids are cute and so is her smile.
“Yes, they are. These are poppies, you know, people wear them this time a year for Remembrance Day.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“How old are you?” I ask her.
“Four, my sister is one and a half, she can’t talk much yet.”
Tony smiles the older kid understanding smile. We’re both surprised that the little girl knows about poppies, it’s a good thing.

We talk about wars and books and maybe going to school next week now that his cold is over with. It’s almost dinner time. We walk to the car. Rain and leaves wrap around our ankles like naughty kids playing games around bedtime. It’s almost November. We drive back to the Legion office to drop off the tray and collection money for the next volunteers. We find Mr. R. in the big pool room at the back. It smells a bit like old cigarette smoke and the uniforms pinned under the big glass panels on the walls look dusty. It makes me a bit sad to wonder if the Legion is still a strong presence or slightly fading away… Who knows, I wish they stay, people like Mr. R. sure believe in it and that’s perfectly right. He sees us and comes to us right away. He smiles and hands us each a poppy quarter – Royal Canadian mint! – and a cup of jelly beans for Tony. Lots of them. To share, of course, he winks. He shakes Tony’s hand ceremoniously. Tony’s eyes meet mine. He’s proud and tall. I am too.
We walk to the car eating jelly beans. Sure I am a health freak, but this cannot be missed. I don’t like the black ones though, I tell Tony. Yellows are perfect.
At home I give my shiny poppy quarter to Sasha and Tony shares his jelly beans with him. One day he’ll share his too.

The kitchen smells of apples and cinnamon now, wafts of goodness slither out of the oven tickling noses and warming up hearts. End of October is the best time for apple pies. Outside it pours.
“We’re lucky we got to stay inside with the poppy tray, Mom,”
“Yes, that too…”

Flying Gerbils and What You Can Learn From Them If You’re So Inclined

Ever seen a flying gerbil? Me neither. Except for that mouse I rescued from my cat’s mouth when I was five. Shortly upon rescuing it bit me and the pain made me send it flying, which action was interpreted as permission to gobble by the cat. So technically that was a flying mouse. Today our resident recently rescued gerbil decided to sink her little chomping devices into my right thumb. So lifting her high up in the air and sending her flying happened before rational thinking was reestablished.
“What was that, Mom?” Tony’s curiosity was genuine. He’s never seen a flying gerbil before.
Slight chance too if you own a meek one. Not this one. Her name River Sunlight. The second was Sasha’s suggestion and yes, it sounds new age but as we’re dedicated river rats we figured there’s nothing wrong with that. After hanging onto my thumb for dear life River flew across the living room and landed to a sweet quarter of an hour of gerbil freedom.
I felt bad and forgave her, pain and all because I have a long history of rescuing strays animals and birds and loving them all. It’s not pet-owning per se because these animals were their own masters, you see.
I once sheltered a fallen baby bird until she was old enough to learn to fly, which she did but as much as I hoped she’ll fly back to her world, she most likely did not make it past the resident cat with those wobbly flying skills. I had a dwarf rooster that died in my arms in my parents’ kitchen and was buried next to my hamster and later on my bunny rabbit who grew to be of gargantuan size and became the undisputed owner of my parents’ yard. Maybe that’s why the hedgehog moved on.
Now that you’re almost tempted to say you have an idea of the extent of our critter madness, I’d say don’t run ahead of yourself or you’ll never find out that I had a snail hatching party set up in my room when I was in elementary school. You’d never try escargots if you see how cute they start out in life.
But here’s the rest of the story, present day that is. Recently Sasha was gifted a fox fur by a close friend who knows about his love for wildlife. Fur, wildlife love, a bit of a strange and unorthodox mix, you’d say, but it’s there, the love for all living things. The fur is the closest he’ll come to wild animals for now and is just bridging the worlds. For now. He takes the fox to the beach and people stare. Don’t judge before you ask, I’d say. He sleeps with it and I can’t even frown because I was once allowing my cat to bring her whole litter of newborn kittens in my bed. They were cute and so tiny, what else can I say.
And there’s a growing list of critters we’d like and it goes like this:
– dog (we all agree it would be nice but I have the last word for now and I’m saying not just yet)
– cat (Tony’s request, pending Sasha’s dismissal of his severe cat-triggered asthma)
– gecko (this one eats live crickets and I cannot bend my head around setting the scene for murdering those beloved summer serenaders)
– snake (this particular one only eats dead animals, Sasha said. No, he was not being sarcastic about our flying gerbil nor was he hinting that I would be in charge of providing the meals).
– baby crocodile (this, I swear, I never said yes to, but somehow Sasha believes it’s a done deal)
– hedgehog (yes, that’s me. If I find a rescued one that needs a home you’ll hear about it).
So River has nothing to fear. She’s in good company. And while she’s here she’s teaching us about boundaries. There ain’t no crossing or else. And no pointing fingers (yeah, puns and all intended). Ever seen a flying gerbil? If not, look for one, you’re bound to learn something good.

Honeycombs in Granville Island and A Turquoise Ocean

It’s Friday, another pro-D day (professional development day) and since the boys are staying home I thought we should make it a good day. Coconut pancakes start the day, friends come over to play for a bit and then we head over to the Museum of Anthropology. It’s raining but there is absolutely nothing wrong with any of the rain drops. They fall exactly where they should and each weaves perfect strands of freshness with the crisp air.
There’s totem poles and dug-out canoes, bows, arrows and baskets made by the First Nations people. Pendants, figures. And then more from every corner of the world. We sail over continents summed up in pieces of clothing and jewelry. There’s drawers of artifacts, all covered with glass so Sasha thinks it’s all a big tease, but the wonder of discovering things as we open each drawer is as real as can be. When the boys had enough we head out and stroll through the dripping woods that surround the museum. Forests are most alive when it rains, we hear trees splash their leaves in puddles just like kids splash their feet in every decent puddle they see. There’s a celebration in every rain that embraces the earth and today is no exception.

We drive by the beach and the ocean is a dirty turquoise that stuns. The clouds on the other side of the bay have rolled all the way down the mountain and their mouths are hanging open in astonishment. It must be that turquoise shade.

We’re headed to Granville Island. It’s the day of the honeycomb. You see, Tony has been asking for one for quite a while and there really is no better moment to do such thing than now. The market is busy. As always, I’d say. We stop and ask about the honey place and the man who makes beautiful stencil cards tells us where. He’s jolly and friendly until Sasha wants to feel the cards.  “Oh no, little one, they can’t be touched.” Well, I dare you to be five and not touch a tiny black paper cat that glides up these tiny black steps into an orange house. 3D stencil cards are just not easy to deal with. The man seemed to have had the angles at which the cards are exposed figured out just so. I take the baby octopus and his brother away from temptation and we go and buy a perfectly round, wax-covered honeycomb. We taste some honey and my little insatiable octopus feels the jars. They’re tiny and shaped like honeycombs, the glass hexagons have to be touched. I find it fascinating to see how much children rely on touching to understand the world around. Hot coffee and green olive loaf are part of today’s spoils.  Dusk is licking the wet pavement we leave behind as we slide away from the busy peninsula. Pavarotti’s Nessun Dorma ushers us gently into listening silence. The olive bread is soft with bits of peppercorn in it. The rain has picked up again.

The Problem With Pink

The advertisement flyers did it. The pink cupcakes, the pink cookies, all highly processed made from refined flour and sugar, plus artificial colors, they had the well-known pink ribbon right next to them. Eat that to support breast cancer research? Really? And then the other flyers with cosmetics, pink seat covers and the rubber mats for cars. And plastic stuff, lots of products adorned with the pink ribbon. Well, I am slightly irked. OK, not slightly, but very much so. Some of the very things that have the pink appeal – no pun intended at all – should be avoided in the first place. Cosmetics companies that still use carcinogenic compounds, whether willingly disclosed or not, throw the pink ribbon on their forehead and walk proudly down the street. Plastics, research tells us, we should stay away from if we can help it, because some plastic compounds can affect the endocrine system and increase the risk of cancer. Remember bisphenol A (BPA), we’re still fighting to kick it out and it’s not easy. Buying plastic products to seemingly help fund cancer research is a bit of a cruel joke, I’d say. Test-driving cars and having money donated to breast cancer research for each ride when the very chemicals found in new cars have been shown to increase the risk of cancer, plus the exhaust gases adding insult to the injury, well, you do that math and please let me know if it looks better from your perspective. Because it sure looks gloomy from where I stand. If you think I’m a naysayer just look into how much of what you’re paying for a certain product that comes with a pink ribbon actually goes towards breast cancer research. After all, a good deed should be a good deed through and through not just on the surface. Because you see, if the seat covers are made using plasticizers or flame retardant chemicals which have been linked to cancer, then no pink ribbon in the world should be part of the selling advertisement. Yes, I agree that flame retardants in cars are a must, but removing the pink ribbon would only seem fair. The same goes for those $10 winter mittens, $1 of which will go towards breast cancer research. If cotton that was conventionally grown using pesticides that increase the risk of cancer was used to make the mittens, then part of the purpose is somewhat defeated I’d say. It’s time we care about all that we put out there and many companies do. It’s the air we breathe, the water we drink, the food we eat and all that long list of things that we use on a day to day basis. We can’t have it perfect, but we should strive for clean.

So, the ribbon. A good reminder by all means. Breast cancer is real. Globally, it affects more women than any other type of cancer and is the leading cause of cancer-related deaths among women. Hearing that is scary. Knowing what to do to decrease your risk and lending is a hand to finding a cure, well, that’s empowering. Awareness is crucial and so is the money to support research and spread the word. Should we kick the pink ribbon to the curb? No, not at all. There are walks and runs for breast cancer and there’s pink ribbons all over, there’s great ad campaigns about eating healthy and avoiding things that could increase the risk of cancer, including chemicals in the first place, and then there’s attaching the ribbon to something that makes a positive difference in the life of women. There’s so much you can do. Donate money, give a friend or family member who is dealing with cancer your time and energy, raise awareness in your own way, buy ribbon-adorned products if they are the true thing, but let pink be pink and not just a hue.  After all, October is Breast Cancer Awareness month! So make it real, make it count!

It’s Imitation Shark Fin But Still Not OK

We went to a birthday party yesterday and stopped for sushi on our way home. As much as I like novelty, for sushi I tend to stick to places I know and trust. Hungry kids can make one forget such rules though. A risky move. We’re on West Broadway and between pizza and sushi, the latter wins. In we go. The host asks “Do you want brown rice?”. Yes, we do. “That’s extra.” Healthy food choice vs. money. The taste leaves much to be desired but you never know until you try, right? Waiting for the boys to finish I peruse through the menu book. Farmed salmon on the menu is bad enough. But I almost fall off my chair as I read “Shark fin nigiri.” Oh, the horror. Shark fin? For those who feel like calling it a small issue, well, it’s not and here’s why.  Shark finning is cruel and all but the thing is, the fin belongs to a shark that’s no use to people here because shark meat is just not that tasty. Yes, some people in developing countries eat the whole shark and as long as that’s their source of protein I have no right to say anything against it. But here…A whole different matter. It’s wrong on all levels. And the real kicker is that life as we know it – human life included – really depends on sharks to stay put. You see, sharks are on top of the ocean food chain, as long as we stick to the shores that is. So when we don’t meddle with sharks, they maintain the health of our marine ecosystems and ultimately of our atmosphere by eating species that eat smaller species that feed on plankton. Because plankton absorb up to half of the carbon dioxide we produce by burning fossil fuel. So decimating sharks translates into hurting ourselves. And the future generations. Calling it selfish does barely address the issue. Irresponsible and immature would still not be enough.
“Are you really selling shark fin products?” I ask the hostess on our way out. She paused for a second. “It’s imitation shark fin.” Imitation gets people out of trouble I guess. But why bother? If it’s gelatin and/or starch, just try and make something yummy out of that and sell it as what it is. The imitation version of meat and shark fins is not going to improve anyone’s life. And that’s an entirely different issue but it all comes down to thinking that imitation means processed. The last thing we need. Come to think of it, that imitation shark fin adds to the spiky  issue of disappearing sharks – pun intended – and we got ourselves in a bind.
“Are we going to go there again, Mom?” No, of course not. Tony approves. Later in the evening over pumpkin pie and tea we chat about marine creatures and the wrongness of thinking we have the right to drive them into extinction. Yes, kids can have strong opinions about that and it’s good when they do. To paraphrase the Lorax, unless someone like our kids cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better, it’s not…

Of Purple Magicians, Giant Ice Cream Scoops And Porcelain Ladybugs

It’s Friday. District closure day. No school that is. Unhurried mornings, cuddles peppered with occasional screams for good measure, eating and actually chewing the food, gotta love them. We’re off to Granville Island where Sasha will attend a birthday party. We get there half an hour late and that’s perfect given that Sasha is quite terrified of the mesh-enclosed place with the twisted slide and ball swamp at the bottom. I can’t blame him; I am not a big fan of enclosed spaces like that. Funny how he never described the vast muddy river banks he explores with his brother (until they’re well out of sight) as scary. A matter of taste perhaps.
Tony and I head to the market place after we drop off the little person. “This is like the Diagon Alley from Harry Potter, isn’t it, Mom?” It sure is. Walking through the eclectic mix of food and art vendors is a brand-new experience every time. I’m getting coffee – Hemingway Peaberry is my choice of the day, and no, I am not a coffee connoisseur but fair-trade and organic are a must and after that I’ll take whatever sounds interesting. I am quite sure Hemingway never had this particular kind but I choose to believe otherwise. The purple wizard seems to have appeared from nowhere. How appropriate. Tony stops and his eyes grow big. We’ll be here a while then. “My name is Dave, what’s yours?” Oh, no, he can’t be Dave, he’s the Purple Wizard and that’s that. The tricks win Tony over. He throws me a quick glance and I’ve never seen a bigger question mark in those black eyes ever before. I am a bit too close to the Purple Wizard and I cannot help being an adult. I am looking for the answer to the “How does he do it?” and I soon find it. The red ball is squished in his palm and then with a swift move he puts it away. No one is wiser and voila! there’s only one red fluffy ball left although he clearly stuffed two in his closed hand just a few seconds ago. He’s good. We put money in the grey felt hat and keep on moving.
“But how did the balls disappear, Mom?” Part of me wants to give him the straightforward answer that explains that the balls can be compressed and hidden away in a blink but I choose not to. It’s good to believe in magic. I shrug. “I don’t know, magic!” We buy mango gelato for Tony, this must be the biggest scoop I’ve seen around here. A short and friendly chat later we find out that we can have three flavours in that giant scoop – you can’t find that anywhere – so I mark my Monday calendar to bring the boys back for a three-flavour scoop ice cream treat.
I chat with the Chinese guy who makes and sells cute leather wallets and I tell him about my very special leather bag I bought in Paris 14 years ago. Nope, it’s not a purse. Around the corner I stop and stare. The most beautiful porcelain bowls are perched on small carved wooden shelves and shyly presenting themselves to the passersby. No two ones are the same and the only common denominator is a teeny ladybug on each. The Taiwanese guy behind the counter is as talkative as his present visitors. His name is Joseph. He tells us about how he came upon the ladybug detail, he puts a few small bowls and vases under the light and I see countless more details. I don’t want to know the science behind it, I don’t want the straightforward answer to how does he do it question for now. This is my magic and I want it to last for a while. There is a white vase with black and grey shadows on it and when I hold it under the light I see elephants shuffling their thick legs and long trunks towards some imaginary water hole. Joseph chuckles when I ask him if those are elephants. “It’s what you see, you can see what you want” is his answer, and it is a perfect answer. After 27 years of playing magic with the porcelain he knows. We thank him and get ready to leave. He offers me one of his porcelain ladybug pins. “For good luck.” It’s good to believe in magic.
We stop by the sterling silver jewelry stand. Tony marvels at the gems and the lady and I talk about geodes and she tells me of some gargantuan ones she’s seen, we talk about the best lapis lazuli that is found in Afghanistan, she tells Tony about the big gem trade show in Tucson, and then we talk about skunks and hedgehogs. Her finger tips are black and cracked and I am thorougly fascinated by the jewelry she makes. She invites me to visit her studio in the West End so I can see her work. I will.
We collect Sasha from the party and then fool around in a toy shop. The shelves are overflowing with stuffed animals and I wonder who will buy them all. There’s a Yoda stuffie that must be the ugliest stuffie around. Poor guy.
Time to head home. The morning is scurrying away and we’re letting go of it happy that we enjoyed it to the last ounce of unhurried goodness. Nothing wrong with knowing where you go most days but every now and then it’s good to let things unfold and just enjoy the ride. Tony and I had planned for a chat over coffee and ice cream but somehow we’re both satisfied with having chatted with other folks. There’s always a next time for a chat.
On our way to the car we buy some green olive bread. Sliced.

Page 87 of 99

Powered by WordPress & Theme by Anders Norén