Daniela Ginta, Freelance Writer

Gratitude makes the journey better. Kindness, too.

Category: Armchair Mayor Column Page 21 of 33

It’s That Promising Time Of The Year

By

On January 2, 2017

In Armchair Mayor Column, Health, Learning, Life Stories, Self-improvement, Social issues

 

Originally published as a column on CFJC Today on January 2, 2017.

img_1035Today, on the first day of the year, I had the sweet chance to hold an 11-day-old baby for a few minutes. It’s a form of therapy you could say. Blissfully unaware of the hubbub around her, the baby slept, and her tiny face with occasional newborn grimaces was mesmerizing.

There I was, having just stepped into the new year hours ago, yet the ‘new’ was no longer attached to the year we have just transitioned into but to this new life that reminded me of my sons, of all the new beginnings we crossed together since, of all the lives mine intersected with since I can remember. ‘New’ is an inebriating concept. The desire to do better, to do more, to do, is a powerful one.

My thoughts curled around the many promises I made at the beginning of each year. Lullabies I promised to sing to my boys but sometimes forgot, too caught up in daily must-do activities to remember, too tired to sing out loud.

Promises to keep grace on my side no matter what, to be a better parent, a better friend (to myself included) and a better spouse, to be all of that with room for more… Life got in the way enough times to bring me to my knees. Some promises you keep and some you break, and that brings the humbleness in, the understanding that it is not the performance that matters in the end but the presence.

That some lullabies were never sang is a fact. The snuggles that became deep slumber at the end of the day are lessons I understood later on. Funny thing, that’s what I remember the most. It is about the presence, rather than about the performance. Doing your best under the given circumstances.

It’s what prevents me nowadays from making new year resolutions of any other kind but the ones that bring me closer and truer to those I love. Presence. When well connected to those we care about, we become better, whether we’re aware of it or not. Presence and unconditional acceptance of each other put the wind in our sails. No date stamped on any promises, all that counts is remembering that we are the ones giving meaning to days rather than the other way around.

We saw the end of a year that packed tragedies of many kinds. Every one of them, whether it was war, drug or accident-caused, brought forth the same: people’s lives were ended. People were lost from the loved ones. There is no antidote for absence.

Every one of the stories I read made me cringe in different ways, yet the thought rising every time was the same: presence is what matters in the end. While we still are, while the ones we care about still are, being present keeps us willing, inspired and discerning of the beauty of the journey rather than the promise of a set-in-stone destination.

This year’s promises have to do with holding someone’s hand when they need it the most and reminding people of the smiles they locked inside and can set free. It’s not the beginning of the new year that gives meaning to the rest of the days but our presence in every one of them that moulds them into meaningful bits of life to cherish.

The stories that I’ve learned about throughout the year that passed reminded me of the one simple truth we’re all too often guilty of forgetting: everyone is fighting a battle or more, everyone is carrying a story within. Many have but shreds of happiness in them, yet presence makes everything hurt less.

We are born craving presence, that’s what holding the new baby reminded me. It’s not a feature that requires upgrades or special talents. It requires us to slow down to be someone’s parent, someone’s child or spouse or friend. May this year be the one when we do it a bit more than last year or the years before.

Happy New Year to all!

The Many Kinds Of Magic

By

On December 27, 2016

In Armchair Mayor Column, Kamloops, Learning, Life Stories, Self-improvement, Social issues

Originally published as a column on CFJC Today on December 26, 2016. 

Merry Christmas!It was after 11pm on Christmas Eve that my husband and I took the dog out for a walk. It was quiet. Magic of a different kind. Snow crunched under our feet as we walked, the dog sniffed this way and that, and Christmas lights shone beautifully on so many houses along the way.

The path took us to the Christmas house on Pine and 6th.

The wealth of garlands is enough to make you go wide-eyed every time. Say what you will about excess and wasted electricity, the thing is the lights make people smile. Inside and outside smiles too. That the lights have been a way for the owner, Louise Edwards, to relieve some of the weight her counselling job brought into her life, is not to be ignored either. Stories of pain and grief, stories of hope and recovery, humanity surfacing through each blinking or steady light around her yard. As sobering as it is jolly.

That time of night you could hear a trickle of carols from some garlands wrapped around sleepy, snow covered bushes.

We stopped a while to listen. Fragments of life surfaced. Christmas does that to a person. Not having my parents around anymore adds a layer of sadness that will never go away. Hanging on to memories, dusting them off as I tell the boys stories about my Christmases past, feeling a bit more that emptiness left by my parents’ passing, feeling the richness of having learned so much from them while they were still around and afterwards too.

Quiet tears added to the sparkles laid all over trees, bushes, and house. The unseen side of Christmas, the roots that go deeper each year and gain more significance, the simple truth of what matters in the end: the time we get to be with those we love, the time we find to understand that each of us carries the story of laughter and tears, grief and happiness. All transient, all worth every second of their ephemeral nature.

An invisible owl hooted from a tree as we left, adding eeriness to our quiet night walk. Another piece of magic added.

Today, Christmas midday found us on a frozen lake, lost in an ocean of white. Dog and kids and grownups stepping on each other tracks, swapping laughter, memories, stories and steaming cups of coffee. It will all be shelved for later Christmases, it will all be remembered and treasured. It’s the simple things, the time put into just that… simplicity.

On our way home we pass by the hospital. Another slice of life with a flavour so different than what most of us associate Christmas with. I think of all who sit by someone’s bedside, of all those who are hanging onto life or are about to say their goodbyes; I think of dear friends who carry their suffering with so much grace and how much I have learned from that, mostly to never forget to say a prayer. Thoughts like that always find their way to those you think them for…

I think of babies being born, of the joy trailing behind them, of all the hope they bring and all the precious lessons they bring along, as every human does. If only we’d pause long enough to pay attention…

I think of those who work on the day when most of us have our loved ones around, whatever their work may be. Just being present and willing when most of us take a break. Time offered as a gift, a different kind of offering.

It redefines gratefulness, our dependence of each other, our ability to give if we choose to, and our need to swap the roles of giving and receiving every now and then so we can reach the wonderful understanding of what it takes to be human.

Wherever this holiday finds you, allow for joy, sadness, and allow for thoughtfulness towards fellow humans. It is what matters in the end. No story is written by each of us alone, but by all of us stepping into each other tracks, swapping stories, sharing laughs, offering hugs, meals and wiping tears when needed. Another kind of magic…

Saving Bees One Proposal At A Time

By

On December 3, 2016

In Armchair Mayor Column, Climate change, Environment, Health, Learning, Life Stories, Social issues

Originally published in CFJC Today and Armchair Mayor News on Monday, November 29, 2016. 

Down the street from where we live on the way to the trails there is a sign that says ‘Honey for sale’. I like that. We always buy local honey. We use beeswax candles only and I use propolis to make tincture and propolis-infused calendula ointment using our garden grown flowers and beeswax. There’s a lot of bee stuff in our family life for sure, save for beekeeping, which we might take to in the future.

That so many of us still hesitate when it comes to differentiating bees from wasps is upsetting and worrying. Learning about bees and their role in our life as we know it should be a topic that children come to know early on and adults never forget.

Our lives are so intertwined with those of bees and we are so utterly dependent on them that keeping them alive and thriving makes all the sense. Which is why the recent review of the neonicotinoid imidacloprid by Health Canada and the proposal to ban it is utterly delightful news.

Neonicotinoids are used as insecticides on many crops such as grain and oil-seed crops. They are sprayed on Christmas trees and ornamental plants, and used on lawns against the chaffer beetle. You may be familiar with it as it is often used as a topical insecticide for flea infestations in pets.

Imidacloprid and other neonicotinoids act by blocking the transmission of signals between nervous cells in insects. Trouble is, the beneficial insects such as bees, and other soil critters are affected when the chemical is used. Imidacloprid is likely the most widely used insecticide nowadays, thus the review initiated by Health Canada.

The neonicotinoid and bee death debate has been active for a long time. There have been petitions to ban the chemicals produced by the chemical giant Bayer, and several municipalities have banned this class of pesticides due to their ill effects on insects and wildlife.

Countless reviews and studies have come to the same conclusion: bees (other insects too) are affected by neonicotinoids. Enter Health Canada’s latest review and ban proposal which will be followed by more reviews on other neonicotinoids.

The big circle of life has immutable laws. If bugs are not well or, worse yet, dead, so will be the critters consuming them such as birds and many crops can be left unpollinated or exposed to other pests. Because of agricultural runoff, water can be contaminated with the said chemical, often in concentrations 290 times higher than the levels considered dangerous to wildlife and insects, according to the review conducted by Health Canada.

The proposal to ban imidacloprid by Health Canada is a daring one. As it is often the case with things pertaining to the big picture, many of us are unable or unwilling to see the trouble until it’s staring us in the face. This proposal brings hope that we will not get there anytime soon.

In this case, a governmental organization has got our back. Yes, I just said that and it’s not what you hear me say often. Well, here’s to hoping that the good people at Health Canada who got this ball rolling will keep it rolling. For the bees, for the environment and for our health.

And while we’re waiting to see it done, here’s but a few reasons why bees are so darn amazing:

  • Because they visit up to one million of flowers for a pound of honey
  • Because they can do the waggle dance to ‘tell’ where the sweet nectar is with the kind of precision that humans and their GPS systems have yet to attain. The information includes the angle of the sun too.
  • Because their hives are built of perfect little hexagons with perfect 120° angles so that the most amount of honey can be stored using the least amount of material
  • Because they have figured out how to slow down aging (tip: engaging in social activities)
  • Because due to their pollinating efforts we have much higher yielding crops and higher quality produce
  • Because we depend on them for colourful meals and overall good health.

Now you tell me, are they worth safeguarding or what?

Social Conscience Should Be On This Year’s Christmas Wish List

By

On November 21, 2016

In Armchair Mayor Column, Climate change, Environment, Kamloops, Learning, Social issues

Originally published on CFJC Today and Armchair Mayor News on November 21, 2016. 

Exactly four days ago my family and I moved from one area of Kamloops to another. Before packing up the house we selected the items we no longer use but are still in good condition and we took them to a couple of our thrift stores of choice (ran by volunteers and raising money for worthy causes.)

Upon unpacking in the new place, we sorted some more and more things went to the thrift stores. We’re not crazy shoppers in any way, but when kids grow up and life happens, so does occasional surplus. The simplest thing for us and least time consuming would be to throw it all away, but how much garbage (a lot of which is not really garbage) can our landfills hold? The answer is a sobering one: a lot less than we send there.

The big stores are already playing the happy holiday tunes. Smiling Santas and bouncy reindeer plus all that winter wonderland décor make us go ‘what the heck’ and we add one more item to the basket. Not all bad if we give the extra away to someone who needs it. After all, ‘tis the season to make sure that all of us have what we need, from food to clothing and shoes to household stuff.

Right. With so much surplus you’d think that would be a no brainer. If you ever stepped into the donation drop-off area of a thrift store, you were likely amazed to see the sea of objects. The volunteer on site probably advised to leave your treasures ‘anywhere you see an empty spot’. So much stuff.

And yet, there is still so much need.

A few years ago while still living on the Coast my sons and I went to visit the cargo area in the port of Vancouver. The number of containers was staggering. As far as the eye can see. Some of the best known big box stores were topping the list of ‘most containers received on a regular basis’, our guide said.

With so much merchandise on the shelves of big box retailers, the needs of all the needy ones should be covered. With everything from food to bare necessities and beyond, the homeless, the poor and all the organizations dealing with the least fortunate such as shelters and soup kitchens should have enough to spare.

Yet reality reveals a more somber image. Allow me to burst your happy thinking bubble with a few facts that can and should be rectified soon by all of us:

  • Some of the big box stores (in Kamloops too, yes) would rather throw away their merchandise than donate it, not before rendering it unusable by breaking it or tearing it apart (shared by a couple of my kind friends and acquaintances who have come across it first-hand)
  • Shelters need so much more than they have. A Facebook post I came across not long ago was a plea for donations for one of the women’s shelters in town as the ‘shelves have never looked so bare’. Knowing that a store destroys its merchandise instead of donating makes one’s run blood cold.
  • According to a statistic from the Elizabeth Fry Society, it costs $55,000 to leave a homeless person on the street, compared to $37,000 if the same person was to be provided with housing and adequate social services (the cost would likely decrease considerably if all the big box stores would kindly donate their goods rather than destroying and sending them to the landfill)
  • Approximately 50 percent of children from single-parent families and 13 percent of two-parent families live in poverty in British Columbia, as per last year’s report by the advocacy group First Call. Upsetting, isn’t it, that good food, clothing and household items get thrown in the garbage before someone benefits from them.

What then? We could each do our part and divert most of our personal surplus from going to the landfill by donating it to where it’s most needed. Beyond that, we ought to speak up so the big corporate machine can hear: throwing things in the landfill not before rendering them useless points to lack of social conscience and overall poor form.

After all, a store, no matter how big or small depends on its customers to keep on existing and thriving. We are the customers. We have the right and the responsibility to speak up and ask that those in the community who need help be helped. All it takes is for someone to say: move the surplus to the donation area.

Imagine, if only for a few minutes, a community where waste would be minimal because:

  • Adjacent to the landfill there would be a ‘still good to use’ area where someone’s surplus becomes someone else’s treasure
  • Stores big and small would donate their surplus to the needy in town and beyond
  • Surplus construction materials and household stuff would allow for building of more homes for the homeless and the poor, reducing the number and intensity of problems caused by poverty and social neglect

Say, wouldn’t you like that? I would.

Environmentally Speaking, We’re Really, Really Messing Things Up

By

On October 28, 2016

In Armchair Mayor Column, Climate change, Environment, Learning, Social issues

Originally published as a column in the Armchair Mayor News on Friday, November 28, 2016. 

The last two weeks have been tragic in many ways. If you’ve read the news and are perhaps waiting for something positive on the diesel spill near Bella Bella, you most likely know about the unacceptable low-class response that came from the government.

Yes, the Department of Fisheries and Oceans PR team build a nice little positive update stating that the tug boat that leaked diesel into the water has been pumped clean and the attention is now focused on removing the Nathan E. Stewart barge from the waters near Bella Bella. Right. And then?

Then not much. Our premier said that what we have learned from this spill is that the federal government needs to provide better spill response for any future unfortunate incidents. As for the environmental impact of the spill, including the local economy and way of life… chances are you won’t hear much from either the provincial or the federal government.

The latter is likely pondering over the slew of lawsuits that come with the latest governmental insistence that the LNG terminal near Prince Rupert must continue. It will be a big mess, if we are looking at the Muskrat Falls protests that just about wrapped up this last Wednesday though many scientific arguments were brought against the LNG plant, nothing influenced the federal mind towards rethinking the project.

If it sounds topsy-turvy, it’s only because it is. Who is then to stand up for what’s right environmentally speaking? Ideally us, the people who live here and raise our children here hoping that the world we leave to them will be a liveable one. The question is: are we? Are we united in adopting the one goal that can see us alter the course just enough to ensure survival? Hard to tell at times.

A couple of weeks ago my family and I drove through Cache Creek and witnessed a road check by conservation officers. They were searching for poached animals. A few days later I heard on the radio that over 70 wildlife act violation tickets were handed out and some warnings as well. That was of course, in a small community in the interior. Care to guess what the province-wide poaching stats look like? Your guess is as good as any and no one can tell real numbers since there are far too few conservation officers in the field and the paper work that is done by those tied to their desks does not include poaching numbers.

I’m ready to say if you describe these scenarios to anyone without mentioning this is happening in Canada, they’d never guess it was here. After all, we should have world-class spill response units and technology in place, we should have objective and careful documenting of environmental consequences following a spill, we should by now have a ban in place that will protect the West Coast and preserve its pristineness and yes, we should have enough conservation law enforcement officers and tough enough laws that will deter most of the marauders from poaching. People should not be expected to fend for themselves like the Heiltsuk Nation people are doing now and there should be news of the spill all over so people can stay informed, talk about it and help. No environmental crisis should be ignored, no desperate outcry muffled by pollical positivity that can almost (and cruelly so) pass for facetiousness.

Our planet overall is not doing too well either. Climate change is still debated in some circles (beats me) but there are signs that cannot be ignored and science-based facts that stare us in the face. Among them, a recently published report that predicts the disappearance of two thirds of all the wildlife should we not adopt some quick and drastic changes to how we live as citizens of a planet suddenly too small too crowded and seriously taken for granted. It’s enough to make one tear up and ask how this is possible.

Pollution, unrestricted logging, and large scale farming add to the changes brought upon by a now finicky climate, and the ultimate consequences have to do with our existence on this planet. Human life is intricately and intimately connected with that pf other forms of life, from bacteria to large mammals and from invisible plankton to old-growth trees. Seeing the connection becomes a game changer. Educating ourselves and acting out of respect for life in general is not an invitation anymore, it’s an act of civil duty worthy of everyone who care about being alive.

The said crossroad cannot be ignored. It’s a simple question: What’s it going to be? If we are to prevail, something must change. Any less reminds me of a song by an Irish group called Flogging Molly: ’’Cause we find ourselves in the same old mess/Singing drunken lullabies…’ Late as it may be, there is still time to change the tune.

Rethinking Our Eating Habits Can’t Happen Soon Enough

By

On October 20, 2016

In Armchair Mayor Column, Kamloops, Learning, Life Stories, Motherhood, Self-improvement, Social issues

Originally published as a column in the Armchair Mayor News. 

20150913_103721Whenever we happen to have a meal out, we opt for water instead of any sweetened beverages. Often enough we get an extra question regarding the boys. ‘Them too, water?’ Yes, them too. Water does it. I saw a cartoon today depicting a potted plant with a jug of water next to it, and for comparison, a child with a can of pop. The message was something along the lines: you give water to your plants, why give pop to your children?

It is often assumed that children’s well-being is closely linked to them sugary drinks and treats. I include fruit juices in that category too, since the content of sugar is high enough to make them a treat rather than a healthy option. And no, the vitamin C content does not matter when there is so much sugar hitchhiking a ride through the body too.

On October 11 on World Obesity Day (sad that we have something like that nowadays), the World Health Organization proposed a 20 percent tax increase on sugary drinks. That’d be a good start. The same should apply to fast food though, and soon. Perhaps followed by an objective-thinking fellow or group of (meaning someone with people’s well-being in mind) who would put the brakes on the increasing amounts of sugar and high-fructose corn syrup finding their way into foods that are not even considered sweet to begin with. Sounds crazy and backwards simply because it is.

That does not affect children and teenagers only, but all the age groups. If you think the WHO proposal is a tad exaggerated, take a look at the obesity stats: worldwide 600 million people are obese. For comparison, approximately 795 million people do not have enough food to eat on a regular basis.

Almost 100 million children in developing countries are underweight due to continuous hunger (I find it very cynical that we call these countries ‘developing’ given the raw situation people face there) and 3.1 million children die of starvation yearly. The number of obese children worldwide reached 233 million this year. Numbers are truly stunning.

As for Canada, we have nothing to brag about. One in four adult Canadians and one in 10 children are clinically obese. That means an increased risk of type 2 diabetes, stroke, heart disease and cancer, to name but a few. Not to mention a decreased self-confidence and even more serious psychological issues in case the of teenagers and children. Yep, it’s a mean world out there and the flow of perfect bodies, many advertised by the very companies that make us fat, is a never ending one too. Which is why rethinking the way we eat and feed our children has to happen, and soon.

In that context, the news that we are about to see yet another fast food place getting built right by a school (McGill and Columbia, right next to the new Stuart Wood Elementary) sounds like a bad joke. If anything, school curriculum should be focusing quite a bit on what healthy food is and why it is important that we eat that instead of junk food.

That should work hand in hand with government subsidies to the small farms, with education sessions on healthy eating which can include cooking classes too (imagine your doctor writing a prescription for that!), and with city halls being adamant about not allowing fast food places to pop up near schools.

It may seem otherwise, but we are in the driver’s seat. We can make choices and with our choices we can influence the way businesses come and go in our city. As long as we keep in mind the big picture and the reason for giving up on sugary, rich-in-everything-but-nutritionally-poor foods, there is hope yet that obesity and the health-related issues threatening children and adults alike will slowly disappear.

An argument I hear often from people who hold onto their bag of candy or cookie box is that you only live once so might as well live it up. Yet the thing is, when we choose nutritionally poor foods we live it down and our quality of life and overall health levels are decreasing, despite the momentarily immersion in gustatory bliss.

That bliss can also be achieved from a different direction and with much better outcomes by reminding our taste buds of the foods intended to keep up both happy and healthy. As for side effects, I foresee only good ones: eating less (nutritionally adequate foods are satisfying in smaller amounts) while appreciating food more. That will also take care of the indecent issue of today’s western society, which is food waste.

Worth a try, don’t you think?

Why Do Pitt Bulls Get More Public Attention Than Abused Children

By

On October 7, 2016

In Armchair Mayor Column, Learning, Life Stories, Motherhood, Self-improvement, Social issues

Initially published as a column in the Armchair Mayor News on Friday, October 7, 2016. 

ProtectSince 2011, at least 233 children between the ages of three and 18 have been subjected to sexual abuse while in foster care. That is in British Columbia alone. The majority of them were girls and more than 60 percent Indigenous. To put it in perspective, approximately 25 percent of the children in foster care in our province are aboriginal.

The report created some ripples on the day it hit the press, but definitely not enough and the ripples also did not carry through the next few days. In other words, it’s not something we talk about and become rightfully shocked by.

In contrast, the Montreal pit bull ban got so much publicity and word of mouth that it reached many corners of this province and the country too. While I will not go into that debate, my contention revolves around what makes us tick as a society. That over two hundred children (many more go unreported) were subjected to sexual violence in Canada in this day and age should make us all stop and question our priorities as a society.

Love or hate pit bulls, the thing is, we talk about it, we have it in the news, petitions are flying (one had approximately 191,000 signatures a week or so ago) and we collectively argue about the ban. There are some pretty strong opinions flying out there if you care to check the news.

For the record, I love dogs. I have one I dearly love, and I do think that dogs deserve to be cared for the right way. But, I am of the belief that every dog owner should be charged or drastically fined should their dog attack anyone and harm them. The money should go straight to shelters to help other animals.

On the other hand, are we being just as vocal about those abused children? A year ago or so I wrote a column about a little girl (age 2) who died while in foster care, bearing many signs of physical abuse. It saddened me then and it still saddens me now. There was a lot of muddling in the case as the foster parents denied being physically abusive and the natural mother who fought hard to get her baby back had a history of mental disease.

B.C. Minister of Children and Family Development Stephanie Cadieux still maintains that the ministry has rigorous standards when choosing foster parents. Outrage? Nah. New measures will be implemented, possibly after paper-pushing, stamping, approving of this and that, and then some more paper-pushing. Meanwhile, children suffer.

It’s hard to believe our most beautiful province has a shameful reputation when it comes to how we take care of children. Not mine or yours most likely, but of those who were born under less lucky stars. The most vulnerable of them all. They drop even lower and the sky above them darkens even more with every day of abuse and mistreatment.

It’s high time we put a stop to that. That in every society throughout time people found themselves at the opposite poles of status, financially or otherwise, is true. But nowadays we are privy to enough information to be able to step up and stop any kind of abuse, to shorten decision-making time when a child’s life depends on it and to make it big news and a subject of conversation until the issue does not longer exist. To paraphrase our PM who is still dragging his feet in the Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women Inquiry, this is 2016. Almost 2017 in fact.

I believe in compassion and second chances, yet there is a fine line we ought not to cross when dealing with children who are subjected to sexual violence of any kind. The problem is, many of these children are scarred for life. Second chances are, in these cases and sadly so, more often for the perpetrators than for the young victims.

When we think of the future we think of children. They are the ones carrying the legacy into tomorrow. The more we allow as a society for a partially rotten legacy to exist, the more troublesome the future we hope for becomes.

A quote I often think of belongs to Nelson Mandela: ‘There can be no keener revelation of a society’s soul than the way in which it treats its children.’ Am I right to assume that our society’s soul is not doing too well at the moment? We can each do something to make it heal by fighting to treat our collective children better and let no harm of the above sort come to them.

Page 21 of 33

Previous

Next

Powered by WordPress & Theme by Anders Norén